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August 31, 2023

I wonder how many times the winning rain droplets from my imaginary rain races have undergone their rain cycle. Can it be considered reincarnation when they've evaporated from the Earth's surface, condensed into clouds, and eventually precipitated as droplets back to the surface? Classes are canceled; again. I'm still on a call with Wacky. I'm gonna stop mentioning that in my entries because I know it's gonna last for a while. But just know that we haven't ended the call unless stated otherwise. I actually got ready for school and everything. I was in the car when the class suspensions were announced. Sine suggested we should drop by McDonald's and hang out since we were already awake so early in the morning. I went back home first and slept for a while. When I got to our meetup place, we talked so much. I actually miss her. I always do this thing where I cut off people for a while, but my friends are always understanding. It's just a thing I do. It's always never anything personal. We spontaneously bought tickets for this movie too. We made like a TikTok while waiting for it. We watched Gran Turismo. It's so good. I loved it so much. Probably one of the best newly released movies I've watched in a while. After that, I got myself school supplies. It's way overdue, but at least I have stuff now. I also got hoodies because I needed more capsule clothes. We bid our farewells; it was a fun day. I showered when I got home and finally caught up with my blog. I fixed my classes, and I'm just hoping that if they cancel school for tomorrow, they do it earlier. I am too sad to function.

August 30, 2023

The make-a-wish bracelet broke off. I made one of my off-the-rack wishes. Nothing that special. It did surprise me how quickly it broke off. I did my blog. I haven't been exactly the best at catching up, but I've done it before. I can do it again. I'm still on that same call with Wacky. During the afternoon, I picked my baby brother up from school. He has friends now. Good for him. I played Roblox with Sine, and she caught me up with so much school drama. She's like my source. My level of prioritization with this whole social world is pretty low, but it's still fun that I can remain neutral with everyone from my lack of interest. Neutrality is usually a double-edged sword. But not in this case, I'm like someone who's outside the 4th wall. I'd pick a side but they don't pique my curiousity or attention at all. I know when my opinion isn't needed too. Wacky and Tony joined my Roblox game with Sine and stole me away after Sine left. We watched Mission Impossible. He told me it was a stand-alone, but it totally wasn't.

August 29, 2023

It is way too early for any of this. I received a message from my brother's girlfriend. I should start planning for my funeral. Wacky's still on my phone. My mom literally saw my call screen. Then my phone automatically connected to the car, and I swear everybody knows. This is karma. I went to school, and I was late. I think I woke Wacky up, and I was panicking because there was no one in my classroom. Okay, maybe not like that much panicked, but I was definitely confused. I texted my friends, and they told me to just go to the school theatre room. I just slept throughout the whole program. I did wake up halfway because I saw Skylar, and we went to the back because I was alone in my area. It was funny because Sirko's boyfriend was there too. It's an inside joke between me and Sirko, but trust, it was funny. We didn't really have any classes that used their class hours (if that makes sense). After sleeping for like forever, we had this uniform fitting, and the next thing I knew, we had robotics. That's my last class. I was in this group that gave me the worst 8th-grade déjà vu. I was a traitor and relocated groups. There was no way in hell I'd babysit that group. I didn't get to go home early because I had to wait for my baby brother. It's his first day of school! I had Burger King on the way home, then passed out.
Wacky likes roleplaying. He swears it's a joke, but I don't think it is anymore.

August 28, 2023

I got ready for the day. I started wearing this make-a-wish bracelet that I bought in Hawaii. It's supposed to grant your wish when it breaks; I'll update you when it does. We don't have classes, so I'm actually feeling pretty well. I fixed my Altoid tin, like the trinkets wallet thing, which I've been loving so much. Read a few pages of my current book, then fell into a quick nap. I read some more after waking up because I genuinely think it's a good cycle. My baby brother is so clingy; it's the cutest thing. I've been asking my brother to watch Blue Beetle with me, but he has college. So many plates due in so little time, and literally not a single day off from school, so that sucks. My baby brother's currently sick too. I've been talking to Wacky a lot. I mean, I've been talking to him every single day, but I looked at my phone screentime, and it's like a concerning amount of time to be talking to someone. I'd say it's an average of like 6 hours a day. And that doesn't include the sleep calls that I can't even consider sleep calls anymore because they last until the whole day.

August 27, 2023

Mistakes were made. It was one of those ethical dilemmas that are frequently contemplated. With this whole thing, it seems to all really come down to which factors benefit you more. I'm glad this happened. Skylar had a similar mess up, so I called him. He taught me a lot, and again, thank you. I'll just forget about everything that has happened. Not in a way that it's being avoided, but in a way that deems it too trivial. Scapegoating. I'm gonna leave it alone. I have my own opinions regarding this whole thing, but it's best to just keep that in too. I don't like being the one who wields weapons. They hurt me too. I don't want to add any more unnecessary wounds. I don't claim a sage title. I'm don't always have the most sound judgements. I honestly just don't want to talk to people who wouldn't listen. I've never been the biggest fan of hypocrisy. During my call with Skylar, we had like this really deep talk about life, and it's a great refresher. I never feel like I'm sharing too much because our life problems have always been so similar.

August 26, 2023

I had my first kiss.
I met up with Wacky around 11:30 pm. He came back from his flight from New Zealand, and I'm a hundred percent sure he's tired, but he insists on seeing me. He's far from where I live too, so I feel bad he has to go through all those lengths. We did the thing again where we looked for each other, except he won this time, and I'm fully admitting it. To be fair, I think my eyesight was way better the last time we met because I could not recognize a single face. I miss him. We talked about a lot of stuff and walked around for a bit because if you read my blog often, I literally don't eat. I accompanied him; he ate because he was hungry, and he's like the prettiest dude I've ever seen. He bought us tickets for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem because we're cool like that and found this bench we decided to sit on while we waited for our movie's time schedule. He gave me a bird (which I decided to name Bird) and I gave him a Star Wars necklace. I read his pastebins, and it was literally so cute. The movie was awesome. It reminds me of every other episode Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles episode, but it was still a nice movie. We were so cute and he was like barely testing waters as we cuddled. We got out of the movies and it was already night time. Relocating to another bench, he laid down on my lap while we talked some more, until we didn't have much time, and he told me to close my eyes. Except, I kept on laughing because it was so cute and also I was nervous, so that went on for a bit. But then he actually had to go, and he kissed me. Then I kissed him back. Then we said goodbye, and I have no idea why, but I followed him. We kissed one last time near the fountains. It was so romantic because the whole time a jazz band was playing.
Future Arwen: I didn't write this until like 4 months after so I know I'm missing a few details but, I was holding on to this memory so much I was so scared of butchering my description of the day.
Future Future Arwen: Ew.

August 25, 2023

As a very (intentionally) disconnected person, I'd really rather not attend my first classes. I mean, I think I'm great at socializing, but at the same time, it's not what I'd say is my most comfortable environment. Today's my first day. I literally mean like my first day because the actual first day for everyone happened a few days ago. I got ready, and I wasn't in much of a rush; they usually don't check for attendance in the first week anyway. I love getting ready. It's the only constant thing I do every day that I'll always look forward to. Sine told me that a lot of people were looking for me, so I braced myself for my usual routine of small talk. I walked the hallways and did that whole greeting (whether it was a fist bump, high-five, or a simple wave because each person has their own customized greeting), hug, how are you, and I missed you - series of steps with a lot of people. Like, a lot. I did not talk to anyone during the summer. It's great to see that nothing has changed. People asked me about my Eras Tour thing too and told me they waited for my Instagram stories that I never posted. See, I love people interactions. Each of the classes I had for the day was actually pretty great. I think I got the good people section. I was friends with everyone, but I wanted to transfer, so I had this letter thing. It was rejected. Like, they didn't even read it, and I gave up easily, rejected. I sat with my old friends because they saved me a spot during the first day. I think that's the nicest gesture ever. Skylar is actually my classmate this year. He's all the way at the back because he's trying to be mysterious or something weird. I think the only time we actually talked was when we had to attend this mass, and he sat next to my seat. We were trying out pranks that I got busted out for, but it was funny. We were dismissed early, but our books were distributed, and my friends were planning for this spontaneous hangout. I offered to be transportation and drop them off at their houses so they wouldn't need to carry the books. Skylar joined us in the car ride but had a different place he was going to. We got Biscoff! We just walked around and did whatever the others' errands were. We caught up on a lot. When it was time to go home, Sine had this thing she wanted to confirm through me. Basically, I had to talk to the dude she kind of likes. It went terribly. I got home and told Sirko all about it. After that, I received another call, and it was from Sine. She told me a bunch of ongoing rumors. The school year had just started. Why? There's also this group of people who told Sine they wish they had my personality. What a compliment. These are the same people I dropped off (they were aware too because I told them I didn't want to be their friends anymore).

August 24, 2023

I woke up a minute before my alarm clock started ringing, like a psychopath. I got ready for school, and luckily, before I got to touch my makeup, Skylar called and told me not to go. I followed his advice. However, he called again saying he changed his mind, and not even a few minutes later, he changed his mind again. In the end, I just didn't go. I don't really mind missing a few of our classes since I'm almost a hundred percent sure they're just doing orientation. I watched more Star Wars. I laid out my plans for the day, and it actually went well. I finished three books today, which is a lot considering I haven't been in touch with my books much lately. I also fixed my playlists and finally gave proper names to those that only had numbers.

August 23, 2023

My routine for the day revolved around sleeping, waking up, showering, watching more Star Wars, reading a book (I read a lot today, please be proud), and repeat. I stumbled upon an old account I had and ended up scrolling through it for about an hour. It was the funniest thing ever.

August 22, 2023

I won't be attending school. You see, Skylar asked me last night if I was going, and I initially said yes. Until he told me not to go because no one else was planning to attend, so he convinced me to skip as well. Now, our situations are reversed because he ended up going to school, thinking I was going too based on my previous response. Anyway, that's that, too bad for him. I did have to take care of Sirko's stuff that he wanted me to give to her dude. He had been bugging me about it, but it's fine. I watched Star Wars with Anakid, showered multiple times, and read my books. Since I've been waking up early, my days have been getting this head start ahead before everyone else is awake. My brother brought his girlfriend home, and they came up to my room to play more Bopl Battle with me. It went well until I'm pretty sure we broke the game. After a while, they started doing their own thing, and I read the book I had available within reach on my desk and then tried to make some progress on my brawler game. I honestly don't think I'll finish it anytime soon.
I've just realized that I do know how to express myself. I know how to articulate many things, but I struggle to translate it into something that a specific person would understand. I'm not implying that others are unintelligent, but there are contexts that could easily be explained with a single word or sentence, yet they require a certain type of comprehension to fully grasp.

August 21, 2023

My brother introduced me to this new game he found. It's called Bopl Battle. The game isn't completed yet, but there was a demo version that icluded all the necessary features to play, so we decided to try it out. It was actually really good. Huge credits to the developer because it's an actual genius game. We played it the entire day, and I lost about 500 times. I'm not exaggerating. Each round we played consisted of around 100 attempts before we counted it as a win. My brother is going to go back to college after a while, so I appreciate that he's hanging out in my room again. I also fixed a few things in my brawler game, though progress is still slow. This is why I have so much appreciation for developers. Games are so hard top make.

August 20, 2023

I'm doing my best to update my blog. It's been a while, and I don't want my entries to pile up until it's impossible for me to catch up. I watched the final two episodes of Horimiya, and I think it's great. My baby brother had this thing early in the morning where he wanted to compare my arcade machine to the one they have uptown. Since he usually gets anything he wants, I got dragged out, which I'm not complaining about. I got to drink Biscoff, and I love Biscoff.

August 19, 2023

I completed my morning routine, wrote my pages, went downstairs, and got convinced to play outside (by my baby brother). I'm not complaining. I remember throughout my entire childhood, I would wake up and go for a bike ride with my brother until it was like afternoon, then finally shower. Obviously, that would be impossible now. I don't know how I used to do it, but I was one active child. I also remember waking up so early just to watch Doraemon and Detective Conan. I guess I was lucky to have spent my early days with a brother who also stood as my friend too. My dad and brother are both at the hospital, and I just wish them well. I had plans with Ria. Before getting ready, I had my dermatologist appointment. We ate at Popeyes first since we were both hungry. Well, I wasn't really hungry, but I had been craving their chicken tenders for like a week now. Ria is feeding my boyfriend ego, like "boyfriend" (persona) Cy. She was saying that I was so boyfriend, because, well, I was. Our original plan for this hangout was just to get our nails done, but sadly, when we went to look for a nail salon, the one we usually go to was full, and the others were not suitable. One of them reeked of the most foul stench in existence. We decided to go to the Lego store instead. We headed to the Build Your Own Minifigure station or aisle and each built a figure that resembled the other. I asked Ria to make me a figure of Lloyd (from Ninjago) because I love him. If you're familiar with how those minifigure sets work, you're required to make a third one as well. We randomly picked each part for a Lego figure that I thought looked like Anakin. I suggested to Ria to name it Child since it was a child, but she refused profusely. Suddenly, I came up with the most brilliant name ever: "Anakid." She loved that. I also started finishing Horimiya. I have an episode or two left, but I'll leave that for tomorrow.

August 18, 2023

The first rays of sunlight have yet to pierce the clouds. I did my pages and had a relatively slow paced morning. I spent the rest of the time playing the piano and guitar. Unfortunately, I couldn't hear my notes, couldn't pluck my strings right, and my hands were cold. I went to the orthodontist, and every time I visit there, I'm always given this task to wear rubber bands, but I never do. I've been really into Steven and Taylor in The Summer I Turned Pretty. I don't think anything else can be any better. They're so perfect for each other (I'm projecting).

August 17, 2023

Early day. I woke up at a pretty average time, 7 AM. I got myself ready and wrote my morning pages. I cleaned my closet while listening to podcasts, and this time, I actually finished. I watched a lot of back-to-school videos and finally completed a book. I've been in the worst reading slump recently. I went shopping with my mom. I don't know why honestly; I just tagged along. We ate at this place, then were originally going to buy things until my mom got a call that my dad needs to go to the hospital. A lot of things went through my mind that night. Some of them weren't good. Honestly, it's not that great at home right now.

August 16, 2023

It's about time I reorganize my entire closet; I need a new system. My closet has never been messier. I still have a long way to go. I cleaned my whole room as well because I left it in a rush while I was panicking due to last-minute packing. I read some books and wrote a few pages in my journal, which I hadn't touched but had brought with me on the entire trip. I read some more and went to sleep early again.

August 15, 2023

I woke up at around 3 AM. I'm not jet-lagged; I just prefer this time in a way, and I'm glad that my body clock has adjusted to it. I didn't do much besides resting and doing mundane activities. I can't do anything because of the little issue that has been bothering me the entire summer. I'm hoping that it gets sorted out soon and doesn't happen again next year. I fixed a few of my things, but my room is still quite messy. I tried my best. I have a lot to clean up.

August 14, 2023

I am tired. I'm still on the plane, and I watched Malcolm's List. It sounded interesting, and I knew that it was a book. I read for a bit too, but that was unsuccessful. Then I watched "A Man Called Otto," possibly the best movie I've ever seen. It made me cry at least 20 times. The movie is about this old man who's just trying to be with his deceased wife again. Despite his attempts, there's always something in the neighborhood that pulls him back, especially when new people move in. There are a bunch of flashbacks, and he's just such a good man. He's grumpy, but he has the biggest heart.
I arrived home and came back to something that was just... Sirko knows about it; I don't even want to mention it. I got all my stuff, showered for so long, then proceeded to go to sleep. I'm tired.

August 13, 2023

The shorthand of the clock has reunited with the long hand at the top. It's the reset - my horrible fate's reset. I got my month's due karma so badly this morning. I woke up feeling very unwell with an upset stomach, which would make sense later on. I packed my things to catch our bus to the airport. I didn't have the best interaction with the person beside me, luckily I had headphones on. When I actually got to the airport, womanhood happened. Airport toilets aren't the best. Our flight was early, so I'm glad there wasn't anyone around. I had to change; this explained the horrible feeling I had when I woke up - cramps. Of course, I always have it worse. I'm honestly grateful they aren't as irregular as before anymore and come like once a month instead of twice or thrice... the pills ruined me, but hey, atleast one of my problems was fixed. Then, we checked in and looked for the lounge. Where is the lounge? We got lost a few times and were exhausted by the time we found it. The worst part about this is that I was so thirsty and accidentally drank soda water. I hate soda water, so I got hot chocolate instead, which I spilled on my pants. I had to change again. I explained to Sirko that I was having my karma reset and it's actually a good thing since school is starting soon, but it was so bad for me. I got to the airplane, and the flight attendants were so nice. We even talked about Taylor Swift for a bit. I have no idea when the day transitions to the next, but I'll put what happened on the plane in tomorrow's entry.

August 12, 2023

It's a shame that the details of my days wouldn't be having any more particular significance and will only ever decrease. Neglected footnotes. I had an early start to this day. I got ready and while waiting for my parents, I finished up some of my sketches from yesterday. I shopped at the beach walk last night, but we're going right back at it again because there's still so much. Before that, we went to the usual Starbucks place. The old couple is still there. They're like the cutest ever. I read The New York Times newspaper and drank my drink. I felt the cold breeze and took it in. We also went to this different coffee shop and I people-watched. I got my sketchbook out and started live sketching. I took a special artist sentiment for this one dude, an old man with a beard. I drew him so multiple times. Then, we went to the beach; I drew some more people. I paced in the sands and had quite a long walk. I watched the people do their stuff. Some were playng beach ball, others were jogging, sunbathing, and it was a very pretty sight. They were setting up the umbrellas too and digging sand since it was pretty early. I took my dress off since my mom got me swimming clothes, and I jumped straight into the water. I saw so many dogs swimming, and it was the best thing ever. I went into a very deep thinking session while bathing. I love the beach. I have such a long history with so many stories to tell about the beach. I was freezing cold when I got out. I saw these two old people, physically old, white-haired and lean best friends, and they were surfing. More dogs swimming, I took pictures of them before I left. I went to the hotel, showered the sand off; my sunburn from LA is definitely way worse now.
After a bit of time, I decided to go out again. I shopped, again, and just looked around. I saw this breakdancing group, and there was this kid who was spinning with his head, and I bet he was like 5 or something. That's really impressive. It was so nice too, since all donations were going to Maui. I got stuff for my brother too. I finally got the penny board I've been looking for because Hawai'i was just such a skateable place for me. I carried it around and obviously tried skating on it; a kid even stopped to tell me hi because she thought I looked cool. And everybody knows a compliment from a kid is the biggest kind of compliment one can receive in a lifetime. I had a bunch of small talks. There's this other dude at the elevator when I decided to go back to the hotel who was asking me if I shredded and jumped over turtles. It was cool; he complimented me too. Everyone here is just so nice. I rested, then around late at night, they apparently host this festive thing on the streets where they fill it up with booths and people kind of just party. Obviously, we participated. There were torches, and everyone seemed so happy. We rested at this grassy area to eat when this dude came screaming at everyone. I feel like I have to add this here because what he said was actually really important. He talked about the fact that people were dying in Maui, and people are so festive like that's not happening right now. Which, I get the sentiment and it really did make me think. In one of my previous blogs, I'm pretty sure I talked about the concept of happiness and whether being happy was selfish, knowing that there are people suffering. People made fun of him, but I thought about it. It's, I guess, more about your own moral philosophy, but to me, I just can't really figure it out. I went back to the hotel, fixed my stuff and the bed completely sunk me into the oblivion of tomorrow.

August 11, 2023

The sun struck me pretty early today. The air here is so fresh that even I smell like vanilla and coconut. I still had my headphones on, and the whole day I just looped Kiss Me by Sixpence None The Richer. We took the beach walk and got to the beach just to take in the early waves. I got Starbucks too and I noticed this old couple. The old man picked flowers for his lady and put them on her ears for them to take pictures. I'd say Hawaii is so romantic. I'd want to experience it too, but I don't even think I'd make it past 20. The thing that surprised me the most is when my parents did the same exact thing. We were seated at a different table, and I can fully say that Hawai'i has a certain air that makes people simply better. We walked around some more. We ate breakfast and visited the Honolulu Museum of Art (HOMA). I got some art stuff from there, and it was great. I love going to museums, and the people here are so easy to talk to and approachable. I had some pretty deep thinking in the car, which I haven't done in a while because I've been drowning my brain with music. There's this puzzle thing that the little kid I mentioned before got. We bought it for him because he really wanted it, and he couldn't fix the puzzle back, so he just kept on crying. Everyone took turns fixing it until they initially gave up and asked me to do it. A fun fact about me is that I had a puzzle phase. I think on one of our early trips to Japan, I discovered those little puzzles and I got a bunch. I somehow quickly figured out the puzzle, and the kid stopped crying. Then he continued to disassemble it and return it to me to fix it again. This is something I'm used to, and as I've said, he reminds me of my baby brother so much, where he'd break something so I could fix it. I did feel so smart. We did other stuff, toured around, went back to the hotel, and rested. Obviously, I wasn't done. I got out and found Sephora. I'm a girl. Sephora is literally every girl's playground. I got so much stuff and just felt good altogther. We visited other shops too. Like, we went through the whole lane, but yeah, at the end of the day, I was sleepy.

August 10, 2023

Did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen? Time went on for everybody else, she won't know it. My feet are still hurting, and I'm still rewatching Taylor on my phone. My headphones remain snug around my head, and my AirPods kept inside my pockets, I have this fear of losing music. I follow Gracie's mom on Instagram, and I saw a picture of her. I could swear I spotted her during the tour because her thick-rimmed glasses were hard to miss. I remember staring at her for a moment, thinking she was so pretty, especially with her big glasses. Today marks my flight to Hawai'i, specifically Honolulu. I read the news last night, and apparently, on the same day, there was a wildfire in Maui. My extreme sympathy and heart goes out to those who were affected by this really unfortunate event. I bought Graacie's Lakers hat at the airport because what are the chances and had breakfast there as well. During the flight, I finally experienced the thing that happens in movies where the cabin crew would ask the passengers for medical assistance. My time went back for a few hours and as I've said, my sleeping schedule is fully on my control so, I landed there without an ounce of tiredness or jet lag.
Hawai'i is undeniably beautiful. The sceneries were so awesome, that it totally slipped my mind to take pictures. Everyone was so nice, and it was an altogether awesome place. It felt so relaxing just being there. The first thing we did was meet my dad's friend at the airport, and we also met their children. The little kid was adorable and reminded me of my baby brother. We went to this place that was like Waikeli Premium Outlets, or something, and I shopped for summer clothes. I also met this guy at an American Eagle shop (I believe), and he was really cool. I tried looking for the Chuck 70s in rush blue at the Converse store there because I was hoping to finally get my hands on Gracie's favorite shoes, but luck wasn't on my side. We ate there for a bit, and the kid we were with did this little thing where she formed a heart shape out of rocks and dirt. We arrived at our hotel, which was a Ritz-Carlton, and a staff member gave me a flower necklace. He put it on, and it smelled so good. We had a suite, and I rested for a few minutes before going out for a late-night walk. The moon illuminated everything perfectly, and the greenery was still evident despite the number of buildings in the area. We had checked in at a shopping center and were literally near the beach walk, so that's pretty cool. I ran a few errands, went back to the hotel, and had dinner with my family at the hotel restaurant. After returning, I fell asleep in an instant.

August 09, 2023

8:50 AM. My voice is nearly gone, my senses have weakened considerably, including the senses in my feet - now barely present. I prepared myself for the day, packed my things, had breakfast and a banana, and then set forth towards Las Vegas. This trip leaned more towards my parents' preferences, so I didn't invest as much effort into my fixing myself. Throughout the entire drive, I had my headphones on, I relistened to the snippets of the concert I'd recorded on my phone the previous night. We paused at Valley Wells to briefly break up the road trip; I distinctly recall the heat of that moment. We also made a stop at the Seven Magic Mountains in Nevada, the hot weather there will be etched in my memory forever. Although I naturally have brown eyes, even they somehow felt particularly sensitive to the intense sunlight. I saw the MSG sphere too so that was pretty cool. In the actual gambling capital, I was honestly just looking around. As far as I could discern, there are literally no activities for kids. I loved each theme they had to offer especially Ceasars Palace. It was all eye candy to me. We wanted to eat at Hell's Kitchen but the line was long and it was just impossible. We walked the sun-drenched streets, where the intense heat prompted us to pause for a quick Starbucks interlude. I swear the air was drier than the Sahara desert. We got lunch, did a bit of shopping, and then finally retraced our steps back and went to our hotel all the way in Inglewood, California.

August 08, 2023

I'm gonna hold on to spinning around. I'll point to the pictures and tell them your name. LA 8/8, my Era's Tour date. I woke up really early. I went down to the hotel to get some coffee from Starbucks because I knew it was gonna be a long day. I went out and got breakfast, which I could swear stretched time slowly while simultaneously making time, and everything I saw blurred so quickly in motion. I went back to the hotel to fix myself up and I noticed that the lobby had this little friendship bracelet-making booth. It was the cutest thing ever. I had already made mine since way back, so I just walked past it. I got up to our room and finally got myself ready. I had a purple dress on, going as Speak Now, and wore a purple bow that had such a long lace like the one Gracie wore when the Speak Now TV was released. I also had to put glitter on my hands, and then fix my hair and makeup. It was so fun. I had Long Live playing in the background, and it was such a cute little get-ready-with-me moment. I went to the Sofi Stadium with my cousin from LA to meet up with Sirko, since we're pretty underage and needed a guardian. We arrived there, and the merch line was already pretty long. I knew what I wanted, and I'm so glad I got there early. When I met with the girl who was selling the products, we had such a lovely conversation, and I swear I just love all Swifties with my heart. Sadly, a lot of the small sizes were running out, so I couldn't get my hands on some of them, but I still got quite a haul because I'm insane. I also got Sirko something because she knew by the time she'd got there it would've been sold out. After I got the merch, I went to entry 4. I met so many people. I talked to so many people. My first trading interaction was with these two people who complimented my dress and everything, and it was my first ever successful trade. The first bracelets I got were Haunted and Long Live because this would later become a pattern of people giving me Speak Now bracelets to match my outfit. I kept on trading, met with so many personalities, and my arms were losing circulation. Sirko finally arrived, and it's good I made so many bracelets that I could still trade and talk to people with her. She came with her cousin, mom, and older sister, and they took pictures of us like parents do. We had the time of our lives and we hadn't even entered the stadium yet. We scanned our tickets and got in. We got the light-up wristbands, and I actually broke mine, so I went back to ask for another, and they just gave me another one. It wasn't long until I fixed the previous one I broke, but they told me I could keep it. We reunited with the people we were with and first got food before finding our seats. The seats. How'd we end up on the floor (top) anyway, you say? That's an inside joke. Anyway, we went back down to finish trading the bracelets we had left, which was still quite an amount and just had our share of interactions with a lot of Swifties. For the first act, we had Gracie Abrams, and I am obviously her biggest fan, so I told Sirko we should go down so we could scream her songs (I screamed all of her songs). It was her last Era's Tour date with Taylor, and it was such a moment. She was so pretty in person. I love her so much. She's literally my favorite artist. Haim was next, and after I got home, I started playing their music because they're actually such a great band. We waited for Taylor in our seats, and the countdown clock finally appeared. The whole concert was great. She owned the whole night, and it's honestly so unforgettable. Me and Sirko did the chants, and one highlight of the night was when we gave her this 8-minute long standing ovation. Our surprise songs were "I Know Places" and "King of My Heart," and we loved it. You'd think that in such a steep stadium, we wouldn't be able to jump around, but we actually did, and my throat was dying. Midway, I could've sworn there was no going back and my voice would forever be gone, but it came back, and me and Sirko are offering our greatest apologies to the people beside us because we were the loudest women you'll ever see. At the end of the night, Taylor's scent was stuck on my clothes, and I hoped it'd linger for longer. There's glitter on the floor after the party. Me and Sirko wore our Taylor merch over our shirts and took some pictures before leaving. We parted ways, and that will be the last time I'll ever see her for at least quite some time. I took my shoes off and walked with just socks on to the nearest convenience store since we knew the traffic would be terrible. Unfortunately, literally, everyone else had that same idea, so I think I even fell asleep on this sidewalk ledge. It was 11 pm. Longest, but best night ever.
Also, I don't know if you've noticed, but there are a lot of Taylor song lyric references I used while writing this entry.
Here’s Taylor’s and Gracie’s setlists, and here’s the actual whole setlist + "King of My Heart" and "I Know Places."
You'd think we'd go straight to the hotel, but no. We went to our cousin's house in Victorville, so I had like a 3-hour car ride, and I got home around 1 am. Obviously, I couldn't sleep without taking off my makeup and showering again because that's just an impossible bargain for me, so I did that. Then I talked to Wacky until 5 am, which is so concerning.

August 07, 2023

I'll take the wrong way home. I got up early and prepared for the long day ahead. I did my hair and makeup without any rush, as Sirko was also trailing behind time. My dad smiled at Sirko, and she has been flaunting it since. Our parents love us together. I gave Sirko the item her friend wanted to give her because I am the best wingman ever. We went to IHOP. I was with her baby brother, older sister, mom, and dad. They tried to make me eat, but I really can't eat much, or I would start to feel sick. We chose Disneyland California Park for the rides, and that's exactly what we did. I'll try to go through the list of rides we went on (which was almost everything). I might miss a few, but we went on the Radiator Spring Racers, and here is where we started learning the Steven and Taylor Party in the USA dance. We did this for every line, by the way. We also talked a lot during the lines, and I swear it was the funniest thing ever. We were peak mean. We went on Guardians of the Galaxy Mission: Breakout!, that was also so funny because I was telling Sirko that it couldn't possibly be bad, but the moment it dropped, Sriko gave me an "I told you so" smug look. We also went on Pixar Pal-A-Round. I remember her baby brother quoting his theory that people don't have a fear of heights but a fear of falling. Sirko and I laughed so hard, maybe a little too hard. We got stuck and started confessing. Golden Zephyr was a ride we attempted, but as soon as we got in, it literally closed off. This seemed to be a recurring pattern. We also tried the Silly Symphony Swings, and I teared up from the music. When I got down, Sirko asked me why I was crying, and I didn't even realize it until I wiped my cheeks. We also went on the Little Mermaid ride, and it felt like the people beside us were giving us looks because our flash went off so often. We tried lining up for the Grizzly River Run countless times, but whenever we lined up for it, it kept closing down (we went twice, and during one of those times, we passed by people stuck on a slanted, heat-scorched area on that ride). It was due to weather conditions or something similar, which was also the excuse for Golden Zephyr's closure. Apparently, the wind was strong, but honestly, it was so hot that there wasn't a single gust of wind in question. We did Web Slingers, which provided enough of a workout for both me and Sirko for the rest of the year. Soarin' Over California was awesome, and we saw so much from up there. Alright, that's not the main takeaway, it was just a lot of fun. I really enjoyed it, especially the Sydney part (I am kidding...). One of the early rides we went on was Goofy's Sky School. We lucked out because the ride opened up right when we arrived, so we practically got on instantly. We despise Goofy. He's the worst pilot ever. I swear, both Sirko and I resent him so much. Goofy was so sharp with his turns. The ride felt like physical torture. We spent a lot of time wandering around Pixar Pier. Sirko's sister spent the entire day convincing Sirko and their brother to ride the Incredicoaster, and it worked out in the end. It was our final ride, and it honestly wasn't that bad. I want to do it again. The loop was awesome, and I tried my best not to close my eyes throughout the ride, while Sirko did the opposite. It was so cool. I absolutely love roller coasters; they give me a sense of freedom. Lastly, we stayed for the World of Color show and had food. Sirko and I finally performed the Steven and Taylor dance in complete darkness. It was so worth practicing during every line we ever stood in. We ate between the rides, and I might not have listed the rides we went on in order, except for the last ones, but I can assure you it was an incredible experience. We practically rode everything. When it was time to go home, we mostly just bought things for people. I was so exhausted that getting ready for bed felt like this super hard challenge. It was impossible for me to sleep without removing my makeup and cleaning up. I fell asleep immediately after, but luckily, I woke up because Sirko and I forgot to transfer the tickets to my Apple Wallet. We took care of that, being extremely cautious, and now I am so ready for tomorrow. Oh, and I also got this horrible sunburn.

August 06, 2023

I went to the airport quite early. I wasn't exactly the most prepared for this trip. I mean, I nearly forgot my suitcase, which isn't much of a problem since it was mostly empty. I remembered its existence just before the car started moving—so close. I'm going to LA mainly for Taylor and Sirko, and I've been anticipating it. The kind you wouldn't want to dwell on, as it was overwhelming while being faultlessly positive it was scary to think about. I don't know how to explain it. It's just something you need to experience in the moment rather than overthink.I talked to Sirko through text in the airport and we were both so excited. A new thing that I feel like I need to write here is that I actually felt pretty. I accidentally turned my front camera on and thought I was pretty that's like a really rare occurrence.When I got into the plane, the cabin crew was so nice. I watched Star Wars: A New Hope, a rewatch, and I finally saw The Perks of Being a Wallflower, a movie I had wanted to watch for a long time (since it's a popular book). It was actually really good. I think I was in LA or New York this very same day last year. The plane ride was really fast It helped that the past few weeks I've been having this persistent sleepiness. I managed to watch Creed 1 and 2 before the plane landed.
I've returned to LA, and Party in the USA is still playing everywhere again. When I reached the hotel, the fact that everyone was wearing Taylor's merch took my attention. I wish I could get my hands on some too; it was insance. Taylor's music filled the whole lobby, accompanying with in a Taylor-themed reception. To be fair, the hotel I selected was practically next to Sofi Stadium, so it made perfect sense. I, personally, haven't experienced jet lag, so I rested for a solid hour and then took a walk outside. I used an Uber to go to Target as well. I bought a bunch items for my Era's Tour preparations, including glitter, glue, and purple nail polish, among other things. Of course, I bought other items too, but I was mainly focused on getting cool stuff. I also picked up In-N-Out for my parents since they're back at the hotel and are just being parents. After returning to the hotel, I showered and did my nails, which, by the way, turned out to be the neatest nails I've ever done. I fell asleep early but got woken up around 1 AM because my parents were talking.

August 05, 2023

I made a bow. A Gracie bow. The one she wore when Speak Now was released. The long one. Isn't that cute. I am finally packing my stuff. Half of it for the first half of this day. Dealt with my Disney tickets too. I updated this blog then wrote the letter that has been bugging me for quite a while. It actually went by pretty fast. I often forget I'm a literal genius. I had my dermatologist appointment too. This whole summer sucks. I have like a few days with Sirko and that's great and all but I'm still going back to hell. I really just don't want to be home anymore. It's so overwhelming because the problem I've been very discretely talking about here in this blog isn't going away until the 29th. That's a whole month more of toleration. I don't want to go to school either because news flash, the whole english department has a bone to pick with me. I've written more letters througout the duration summer than all the outputs I've made for my subjects last year. I'm handling it well since I know how to help myself, but with the school year approaching, I can feel all the pressure and expectations. I'm like a huge disappointment. And that part is like barely any of my concerns right now. I honestly just want to get rid of that one thing that refuses to leave. Sirko knows how horrible it is right now and she's honestly so great for keeping up with all this. I think that one thing is just pushing me to the edge and is affecting my normal capacity to not react to things outside of my control.I made more friendship bracelets while watching Community and Young Sheldon. I kind of just switched on whichever series I felt like watching. I did my last minute packing then choreographed this lightsaber trick because why not? Another problem did come up then I started spamming my stories on this other account. Skylar caught up and asked how I was and that he hopes I'm doing fine. I'm leaving him on delievered right now because I'm too tired to reply to people but I really appreciate it.

August 04, 2023

I need to finish those friendship bracelets. I did like 20 today while watching Community. I do have to admit that I procrastinated a ton before I even started. When I finally had my whole workplace ready, I decided to grab my dusty sketchbook and start drawing this very realistic lego figure with a Darwin (from Amazing World of Gumball) fishbowl head. After that, I had to go to the mall and do my girl maintenance stuff. I also got like ribbons and glitter from this art store because Gracie and the 13 I'd put on my hand. I've been getting chicken nuggets a lot more recently. Even just by thinking about my whole month's diet, I'm pretty sure all that I've been eating is like fast food. Don't ask why. I still have quite a lot of stuff on my to-do list but, I'm not too caught up in it.

August 03, 2023

Today's my dad's brithday. I gave him a fist bump birthday greeting. Which, believe it or not, is the most affection we've displayed. I am in a state of some kind of sleeping beauty syndrome and the weather is what pricked my finger. I started watching Community. I watcehd it so I could have something to multi-task on while making my friendship bracelets. I only made like 4 then we were dragged out. We went to the farm and ate stuff. My dad was with his friends outside the gazebo and I just isolated myself. I picked out a book and underwent a cycle of reading and sleep. I finished somehwere close to the half-way mark.

August 02, 2023

I hate and love this weather. I never thought I'd ever appreciate warmth but right now, I really need it. It's not even cold; it's just so gloomy. I like gloomy, but I hate feeling so sleepy. I know I've talked about this a gazillion times in this blog, but I really hate high humidity. I'm like a cat. But I also love the rainy season, so really, I just don't like that I'm so sleepy right now. I even tried braiding my hair, which usually makes me productive every time. I played with my baby brother too, but my body still remains on the cliff of hibernation. I watched Pinocchio with my baby brother, which was later changed to Tarzan. He decided to just not watch midway, and I ended up falling asleep. I woke up, tried listening to some podcasts, but I still fell asleep. Around 5 PM, I regained my productivity and actually finished all that was in my to-do list. As you know, I always have my small daily tasks that I need to do. There's also a lot of things that need logging. My life is very organized. I finally fixed all of the logics in my brawler game. I was really struggling, but I figured it out somehow. All I need now are graphics and it's pretty much done. I packed my stuff for my very soon trip too. I'm going to see Sirko in California. We'll watch Taylor and go to Disney Adventure. That's super cool. She got her tickets for Disney today and there are no adults. That's cool for me because I'm literally at my peak teenage years.

August 01, 2023

I was awakened by my parents who requested that I pen a letter. Without comprehending a single word they were saying, I retreated back to bed. It's rainy and I can barely get out of bed (even after showering).Sirko's dude has some stuff he wants me to bring to her so I had to deal with that too. Good thing I had plans today because I would not have done anything from the weather that I swear has a sleeping spell. I met up with Ria, I wore all black along with a black bow. As you might have guessed, we went to see Oppenheimer. We got there and we immedieately bought tickets and food. We got there in time this time. The movie was so good and I was fully invested. I swear his eyes got bluer as the film progressed. We had girl brunch, talked and caught up about some recent stuff. Ria also showed me that I actually have my own Wikipedia page. That's so cool. We obviously had a whole moment of just revisiting the movie we had jsut watched and sharing out opinions. I ran an errand and then another, as my brother requested that I fetch some food for him before returning home. Ria went home, I did too. I am very tired. I have this affinity for things that are squeaky clean. I frequently clean my phone, especially after having some kind of long day outside. The sound of a squeak assures me of its cleanliness.My brother taught me how to not laugh in serious situations because I really struggle with that. It went very unsuccessfully. I forgot to mention he came home from orientation and will officially be gone like next week or something. He invited me for a game of Rocket League, which somehow lasted for hours. I was terrible at the game. I used to play this game, so I had no idea how I was doing so badly. It's not even rust; I'm straight up broken at this point. I found out I can't stay up late anymore because I felt nauseous as soon as the clock struck midnight. I continued playing nonetheless. Around 2 AM, we stopped playing, and I just talked to Sirko. I have no idea what we even talked about anymore, but I just know it was funny. It's always funny. I know I just sent her a bunch of voice memos until I tucked myself in.